Cocktails and The City

Sometimes All You Need Are Your Friends… and a Few Martinis

Sundays on the Upper West Side are a time for rest, reflection and, of course, brunch. So, where better to unpack this wild week than over a glass of champagne at La Pecora Bianca.

There’s no better feeling than having the entire of your friend group back together, all laughing and finding nonsense in the simplest things. For the last week, my fiend Steven had been visiting family in India and had been missing out on our daily adventures, and on top of that, my other friend Annie had left to get her wisdom teeth removal surgery. Already our group of six were two men down. Now if you know anything about group dynamics, this loss becomes catastrophic for our daily functioning.

Today, however, was the day they both returned, and we planned to celebrate friendship, and us, this entire week. In a friend group, each person has their own role, and they are vital to the entire dynamic. If one piece falls astray, the entire machine ceases to work. And for this last week, we’ve been missing some pieces.

Likewise, not only are friend groups a complicated dynamic, but men also seem to follow this trajectory.

To celebrate the beginning of the weekend, we were all heading to our local college bar, Amity Hall Uptown. The place where dreams are made and drinks are spilled. Wednesdays at Amity are often eventful, which is surprising since it is the middle of the week.  Although, we all know that weekdays and 8am classes will never halt the New York nightlife. Wednesdays are a special night because Amity hosts “Senior Night” which is said to honour the graduating class of Columbia. In other words, it’s the perfect opportunity for seniors to check out the freshman at college… but that also equals free drinks for every girl within a ten-foot radius of the football team.

This senior night was absolutely packed, it was hard to move an inch, but we are New Yorker’s, we’re used to it. That means, I spent most of my time on the dancefloor with my friends, or in the arms of one of this year’s starting line-backers. I must say I fell prey to the football charm, but not in the most stereotypical way. For that, I have the dynamics of our friend group, and my best guy friend to thank.

This interesting interaction got me thinking. What does it suggest when you are friends with guys? Does this send off a certain message to single men that you’re unavailable? Well, I experienced this first hand tonight. My best guy friend was approached by another guy to “congratulate him” on being with me. What I can only conclude by this is that men must be threatened by other men. But I most certainly am not. I marched right over there and told him otherwise, to which he bought me an apology drink and proceeded to stand with me all night long… So, if there’s anything you can learn from this, we women need to call out the men. We as girls need to encourage confidence. If a guy wants to pay you a compliment they should say it to your face, and that’s exactly what I told him. Now if there’s one thing you need to know about New York College life, it’s that you have to be bold. Maybe the women need to become the new men?

So, then I began to think about what a man should do at the bar, how should they really approach a woman. Does dancing nowadays constitute as conversation? Perhaps, but to really get to know someone then it’s not enough. That’s where you need your friends, the only people you really have to dance with, the people that really know you. But at the end of the night, none of us ever needed a man to validate us. We really needed each other and the new Bad Bunny playlist on the dance-floor.

But sometimes even, the best nights are the ones spent at home, with the people you love. Thursday night came around and none of us wanted to face neither the cold or the club, so we decided to bring the party to us. That meant home-made cocktail night. There’s something about sitting in a freshman residence hall lounge, in the centre of New York with five cosmopolitans and “Saltburn” on the TV that makes you appreciate where you are. I can’t say much of the movie was watched fully either, it became the perfect time for our weekly catch up sessions. It really us true, there is no better company than your friends and a good Cosmo!

Friday night however, turned out to be way less wholesome. Now if you’re really looking for a good night, Rudy’s Bar and Grill is the place to be. When you walk in, you will immediately be hit by the ten to one male to female ratio. Then, once the initial wave of male gazes makes their way over you, you will next be hit by the distinct smell of hot dogs. The two types of dog: the male species and the grill version. Sometimes the choice is an easy one. Greasy food any day. It’s probably better for your heart anyways.5 drink and on top of that a free hotdog?!

That makes the ratio all the more worth it. After spending quite the while there, and speaking to way too many questionable members of the male species, we moved onto the next bar. The Iron Bar in the theatre district is where you will find some of the coolest people in Midtown. From Broadway actors having just finished their shows, to the eager viewers trying to catch a glimpse of the cast of the show they just watched. And what it does guarantee is a perfect vibe for friend’s night out, sharing White Claws whilst overlooking Broadway. Can you imagine anything more New York?

Eventually we ended up at our final destination of the evening, the Mean Fiddler, an Irish pub with a modern take on the interior. Now, what must be said about the Irish is that they make some of the best drinks in town, and the Mean Fiddler remains no exception. You can order one of their specialty cocktails which are based around classic holidays or cocktails that are meant to replicate the productions in the nearby area. For me, I had a few too many Moulin Rouges and I tried to turn our night into my own version of the Moulin Rouge, dancing on too many streets with too much love on the mind.

But in the end, it was the perfect night in the city. Spent with my friends.

There’s something about driving through Madison Avenue at night, up front in the passenger seat. It makes you really appreciate where you are, with the dazzling lights of Louis Vuitton and Tiffany’s illuminating your eyes. And what’s better, is when you know your best friends are in the seats right behind you, with you as you travel home at 4am.

Now, the best way to spend a Saturday is going for brunch in Soho. If you’re in the market for a cool, trendy place. Then Champers Social Club is the place to be. When you walk in, you will be greeted by the hostess, whose outfit is always on point. And, if you’re wondering who you will see there, imagine walking into a cast set of Selling the City, and that is the exact vibe you will see. I went with Steven, the only man I can count on to always have the best outfits, and we had such a great time. Now that the sun is remerging, it’s almost like New York surges with love. Sitting there, by the window seat, sipping on our Aperol Sprits’ and cheese croissants, I could almost picture I was in Europe during summer. That’s the beauty of Soho, it makes you feel so elevated no matter where you are.

What’s even more beautiful about Soho is its Happy Hour Saturdays. Where the streets are filled with people and countless glasses of Guinness. If you are looking for the best places to go, Holiday Cocktail Bar and The Copper Still are some of the best spots for day drinks. You will be sucked in by the open atmosphere and the people inviting you inside. How could me or Steven refuse? Well, it would be rude not to.

And somewhere downtown, Annie was with her parents having the time of her life.

So, after a brunch which turned into a bottomless one, and a Happy Hour Bar crawl, me and Steven headed uptown to meet Annie and her parents at The Palace Hotel in the Upper East Side. Now, if any of you readers are Gossip Girl fans, you know The Palace for its iconic appearance as Serena Van Der Woodsen’s apartment. But what you may not know, is just how fabulous this place is in reality. The tall ceilings and extravagant chandeliers make you forget the hustle and bustle of the outside street, and for some reason it makes you feel complete. Sitting there in the bar with Annie’s parents and her after a long day walking the streets in my heeled boots was pure bliss. It was Guinness at 4, Pino Grigio at 6. My ideal day.

It is always nerve-wracking to meet the parents, whether they are your friends or your boyfriends. So, doubtless I was scared when it came to meeting Annie’s. Annie is my best friend here, and meeting her parents was just as perfect as I imagined. That’s when you know you are true friends, when everything just seems to fit perfectly with them.  For dinner, we went to a beautiful restaurant named Quality Bistro in the heart of Midtown. I must say, their food was to die for. They hand prepare the buttered bread in front of you, and serve it on a platter almost as high as my boots. It was absolutely mouth-watering. Having dinner with people you don’t know yet can be awkward over the dinner table, but when the company is good, the conversation flows quicker than the wine, and this was no different. We spent so much time talking that we closed out the restaurant, the last people to leave. I’ve always been like that in my life. Taking in every last drop. I think that’s what you need to do in New York too. Take it all in, every last moment, because it’s constantly changing.

After dinner we Ubered back to campus and had a quick turnaround. Four glasses deep of wine at this point it was safe to say I was feeling the “New York Love” or maybe that’s just what they call Pino Grigio tipsy? Either way we headed back to the college bar for our last night out of the week. As always, Amity Hall is the place to be on the weekend. But this time, I was set on having a night with my friends, no guys involved. Well, there’s always guys involved, but I just wanted to dance the night away. Unfortunately, I couldn’t be so lucky.

It’s always awkward running into an ex hook up, but imagine you are confined to a dance floor with four of them. Well, that’s what me and my friends had to deal with…which meant it was time to leave. That’s the thing with college friends. You live with them, learn with them, go out with them. They become an essential part of your life, so you better choose them wisely. It’s hard to find people who will love you no matter what, I was lucky enough to find six of them.

Waking up slightly hungover at midday on a Sunday is enough to make anyone regret their weekend. But I don’t regret a thing. Girl, get yourself to the gym and go downtown where you won’t be faced with your actions from the night before. Where you can be anyone you want, in the centre of New York City.  

And just like that here I am, sitting in the Upper East Side writing to you… recovering from the weekend whilst sipping on a glass of Champagne and a Rigatoni pasta. So, as I watch a yellow taxi cab spin in the middle of 74th and Columbus, I realise I am exactly where I want to be, with the people that make me the happiest. 

 So… same time next week?

d groups a complicated dynamic, but men also seem to follow this trajectory.